I can't wait for tomorrow!

And not because Sebastian will go to school all day and then to Chez Flapdoodle all afternoon. And certainly not because I have a meeting about the future of the PTA to go to at lunch time. And definitely not because I have to get up early to go chop up some healthy snacks.

No. I can't wait because tomorrow... tomorrow I get to plant my seeds! In my new big garden!

[cue gospel choir singing "Oh Happy Day"]

I have the rows all ready to go. I have the seeds anxiously awaiting some soil. I have dirt under my nails. And I have a song in my heart.

There will be snow peas, and Swiss chard, and carrots, and Easter egg radishes! And later there will be tomatoes and cucumbers and peppers and melons and pumpkins... and herbs, lots of herbs! (I hope this all works out.)

And after I finished preparing the garden today, I planted my rhubarb and raspberries. I still have the blueberries to plant, maybe also tomorrow.

And while my grubby hands were patting the soil around the rhubarb, the estimate came in the mail for the fence. The cheapest one costs $500 less than the one in the middle, and the most expensive costs 3x what the cheapest one does. So I think I'll go with the cheapest-- the split rail fence. Not just to save $500, but because the slightly more expensive model would have to be painted every year or two, and that sounds like more trouble than it's worth.

I probably shouldn't take my children to restaurants

Because Dorian likes to make announcements like this:

"My pants are my plate!"

Riddle me this

Sebastian wrote some riddles today. Here they are with our guesses:

1. I am something you wear, with holes and made out of cloth. What am I?
Guesses: t-shirt, mask, pants
Correct answer: a pair of socks (Jeremy wins)
Is this a hint that I need to do more mending? I hope not.

2. I have wheels. You ride on me. What am I?
Guesses: A shirt (Dorian, apparently stuck on the first riddle), a car, a "wheel boat" (Dorian), a trike, a "wheel boarder" (Sebastian somehow understood that Dorian meant a lawnmower)
Correct answer: a bike (Jeremy is 2 for 2)

3. I heat up your room. I am a machine. I have a screen. What am I?
Guesses: a space heater, the vent in the floor, the furnace, the sun, the window, the TV
Correct answer: a thermostat
No one got this right, and Sebastian needed clarification on the actual function of the thermostat.

4. I do not like water. I am boiling. What am I?
Guesses: maple syrup, the sun, a fire
Correct answer: flames
Again, Sebastian needed a little clarification, but Jeremy did figure out what he was going for.

5. I hate cold. I hide from big things. What am I?
Guesses: Mama: "Quinn" Sebastian: "It's very small." Mama: [again, with feeling] "Quinn"
Correct answer: a mouse
I'm not sure how I got that one, but I did.

Final score: Hott Mama 1, Cool Daddy 3

The paper is numbered, optimistically, up to 23. We'll see what the riddler comes up with next...

I don't suppose I'm stressed...

Last night Jeremy had to come up and wake me because I was screaming at top volume in my sleep. This time it was the Super-Stressed Dream where I'm trapped in a room with no exit (in this case, a bubble room).

I freak out, but don't scream, if it's the Moderately-Stressed Dream where things are falling on my head, such as spiders, kites, fabric, or sticks. The Slightly-Stressed Dream involves driving my car at a fairly slow speed but being unable to stop because the brakes aren't working. I spend the dream trying to swerve to a stop or trying to find a convenient crash location. Clearly, my dreams do not require a fancy dictionary to decipher.

The worst part is that I had the Super-Stressed Dream over the stupid shit going on with the PTA. It's not even anything important! Certainly not worth straining my vocal cords over. Especially not when Jimbama is coming for the weekend and there will surely be lots of RockBand.

This can't be good

Headline on Yahoo today-- Gold Rush: Unemployed Now Prospecting in California's Hills. I should have seen it coming since one of the dudes at our local CD store now has a mustache fit for a prospector. Perhaps he could just put his face in a river and see what sticks.

This is what we have resorted to, people? Madoff's pyramid scheme goes under, so I guess it's high time to go back to the good ol' days of pannin' the river all day and hittin' the saloon/brothel all night. Why not? There's plenty of cheap housing available.

I'm the king of the castle... you're the dirty rascal!

So, yesterday, I finally got off my butt and called the fence man who appears to be not only the only game in town, but also in a 20 mile radius. Now, in my defense, I did need to wait until enough snow went away that an accurate measurement could be made. That day had come, so I I made the call which went a little something like this:

Hott Mama: Hi. We are looking to put in a fence on our corner lot. Would it be possible to have you come out to do an estimate?

Fence Man: Ayup. Are you apt to be home of an evening?

As a matter of fact, I am. And I am definitely willing to be home to meet with someone who talks like that! So he told me he'd come by one evening this week, but he'd call to let me know when. (I thought this was particularly gracious of him considering our roof man calls at 7am to let you know he's on his way. Or doesn't call at all and just starts removing my chimney.)

Either evening is earlier than I believe it to be, or he was feeling the economic crunch, or something, but he called this afternoon to ask if he could stop by before 3. He has come (well, his son did), he has measured (again, the son) and now I get to eagerly await the $5 million dollar estimate. As we all know, it will be worth it.

Modern parenting in a nutshell

Yesterday at brunch, during "soccer"

Father (to 8 year old son): Hey, not in the street! ... That's a good kick though.