It's not a party without Lenny

Last night was the big night for my September date with Jeremy. We were invited by his boss to a party she was having at her house in the middle of nowhere. I knew that this would not be date enough for me so I insisted on being taken out to dinner first. This was a very wise choice on my part.

We went to a restaurant on the west side of town that I have never even considered going to, but my mother gave us these gift certificates to random places we've never been before that have totally expanded our horizons. The dinner was delicious (lots of butter) and the weather was lovely and other than a fly drowning itself in my salad dressing (I was finished with the salad when this happened), it was a wonderful meal.

Then we went to the liquor store to fulfill the BYOB part of the invitation to the party and headed down a series of winding dirt roads to the boss' house. And what a scene we arrived for! I haven't been to such a ridiculous party since the last party I attended.

• There was a man named "Lenny" dressed in a tuxedo and sneakers dancing on a rock while singing Frank Sinatra karaoke. (Even the hostess didn't know where this dude came from.)
• One of Jeremy's coworkers was so drunk that she tripped down the steps and rolled ass over teakettle all the way down the hill into the backyard.
• There was a dog fight.
• I looked over at one point to see a woman who Jeremy is in the process of interviewing for a job kneeling at her boyfriend's crotch level. (It looked like things were going to get much more inappropriate than they did.)
• Another drunk woman was "dancing" and fell against the furniture more than once before Jeremy's boss' boss decided it would be a good idea to spin her.
• Lenny came over to offer to sing "Moonlight in VT" to me and Jeremy so we could "kiss and cuddle... or fight about the kids."
• I met a man who holds 2 jobs: one as a firefighter, one at a pet crematorium.

That was enough "party" to last me a good, long time.