That's news to me

Our 4 year old neighbor came over to play with Dorian yesterday while I finished hoeing the garden. (It's done! Sort of.) As usual, she had no shoes on despite the 39 degree temperature. She fell off our swing and was crying which led to a runny nose. I went inside to get her a tissue so she would stop using her shirt. (No coat either, of course.)

I wiped her nose and she said, "We don't really believe in these tissues. And we don't believe in toilet paper either. That's because we're Jews. I'm a Jew."

Is there something about this in the Torah?

Why I don't have two kids one year apart

Yesterday I watched 2 year old Davy for Amanda and Nathan while they closed on some land in Marlboro. (Congrats again!) Everything was going smoothly until we were almost done with lunch.

Davy announced he needed to poop. I take him to the bathroom and place him on the toilet. So far so good.

Dorian yells that he needs something. I step out of the bathroom (which adjoins the kitchen) to cater to the almost 3 year old. Finishing that, I turn back to the bathroom to find...

Davy has fallen in the toilet! He's just a head and feet sticking out. He didn't yelp or anything! Suppressing the urge to laugh, I pull him out and dry him off. Just as I get him settled on the seat again, I hear...

"Mama, I need to pee! I mean, I did pee." I return to the kitchen to find wet pants and a puddle. I take Dorian into the bathroom to clean him up and put him on the little potty on the off chance he still needed to relieve himself a little.

The scene ends with the 2 toddlers sitting side by side on their potties yelling, "Conk on the ___!" (insert anything you can see, ie. shower curtain, sink, towel, floor)

It's squashtastic!

I think I went a little overboard at the farm yesterday. When I got home, I had 6 delicata squash, 2 butternut, one buttercup, and a pie pumpkin.

We won't be lacking for vitamin A this fall, that's for sure!

I'm so glad I moved...

Two blocks away. My neighbor stopped by the bus stop yesterday afternoon to tell me that she found 9 bags of heroin in her parking space over the weekend. Her parking space used to be my parking space.

Dorian ist ein Berliner

Dorian asked a question this morning to which Jeremy answered "Nein." (Why not?)

Dorian: Nine?

Jeremy: That's German for "no".

D: Nine?! Eight.

J: Eight?

D: Eight is German for "yes".

Sounds like he's ready for a trip to Auntie Kathrin in Luneburg...

A trip to the basement

Yesterday, I went down cellar to take care of a few more weatherization woes plaguing this old house. When you're almost 130 years old, a few cracks are going to start showing. And some of your cracks may go clear through your foundation. So I got some spray foam and went to work. Just in case you can't see the grass through the crack above, I thought you might like to see how much light comes through.

Our chimney was unusable, so we had to install a power vent to avoid being killed in our beds by carbon monoxide. Now we have a giant pipe running from the oil furnace under the original part of the house into the crawl space under the first addition. The exhaust is pulled by a fan attached to the outside of the house near where my kitchen sink is located.

Over the years, this house has had every major heating fuel. Originally, there were wood stoves, one upstairs and one down. Then, there was coal, evidenced by a cool old control in our dining room (left). They also had gas at some point and left the old meter behind when it was disconnected (above).

And while I was downstairs, I found all of these jars. One lid still has a slogan for Kraft mustard. I like to imagine the women who used to live here putting up their food for the winter in the same kitchen in which I have been canning. 128 years of sterilizing and filling jars is pretty awesome. The heating fuel may change, the variety of the fruits and vegetables may change, but the process is still the same.

Blanket update

I finished the gray section at the top yesterday. Even with the complicated cabling, that section was less than 2 hours of work. If only I could devote 2 hours a day to this blanket, I could finish in about 2 weeks. (Don't forget that it needs a border.) Right now, I'm just hoping it can be done by Christmas. It would be a really nice gift to myself to be done!

But it's so yummy...

Yesterday we stopped by the co-op so Sebastian could have a quick puke on the floor of the deli (true story) and we could pick up some milk and eggs and yogurt. Over near the eggs is a little kiosk where they often have samples. Not yesterday. No no. Yesterday, Sebastian's friend, the education coordinator for the co-op, was passing out bags of chocolate and pamphlets for "Reverse Trick-or-Treating".

What is reverse trick or treating, you may ask? Well, that is when your child goes around the neighborhood as he normally would, begging for candy from strangers. After receiving a piece of chocolaty yumminess, he then hands the person a card with a piece of Fair Trade chocolate attached and says one of the following things:

• Thank you! Here is a piece of Fair Trade chocolate for you!
• Here is a card about how to end child slavery on cocoa farms!
• Here is a card on how you can help end poverty for cocoa farming families!

So, now we have this propaganda in our house and Sebastian wants to participate, but he doesn't really understand what it is about and, I think, just wants to make his friend happy. While I appreciate the sentiment of this exercise, I have a few problems with this.

1. I think it is rude to take the candy that you are saying is wrong and tainted by the blood and sweat of children. If you don't want that candy and don't think people should be buying it, then don't take it in the first place. If you just throw it away, the efforts of those little slave children will be totally wasted.
2. Why not just hand out the propaganda and leave the candy for people who want it? Raising awareness is a good thing, but making someone feel bad for giving out candy to neighborhood children is just plain mean.
3. This cause is probably not the cause of 95% of the kids who will be passing these out on Halloween. This is their parents' cause. This is child exploitation, too. All the information that came in the packet makes it clear that a child should be giving this out. For example, if you go to a community event instead of door-to-door, the instructions read, "As you walk around the event, your child can approach other parents..." Don't make your child your pawn, people!

Obviously, I don't want kids suffering for my chocolate addiction. Bloody chocolate probably doesn't taste as good. But I don't think that this method of informing people about the business practices of "Big Chocolate" is appropriate. If you want to pass out Fair Trade chocolate at your house and give out a pamphlet with it, go ahead. Maybe I will just pass these out with our organic lollipops, but Sebastian will definitely not be carting them around our neighborhood.

They say pimpin' ain't easy

Well, the hoeing ain't either. That's my future garden up there. I really want to finish digging it before the ground freezes. But it was raining yesterday. And today? Snow flurries. I kid you not.

Scenes from a nature program

Today I braved the wilds of Sebastian's 1st & 2nd grade classroom to introduce the kids to the wonder of leaves. Leaves-- the food factories of the plant. The fundamental components of all the food we eat.

I think there was definitely too much information packed into the hour I had with their little 5 to 8 year old minds. They started to lose it a little toward the end.

Our final activity, after the puppet show, scavenger hunt, and leaf rubbings, was a quick discussion of how we can thank a green plant for all of our favorite foods. What follows is a sampling of the conversation. [Initials are substituted to protect the innocents.]

Me: So, who has a favorite food? A?

A: Ummm.... [long pause] Mac and cheese!

Me: Now do you think we can thank a plant for mac and cheese?

Kids: Noooooo!!!!!

Me: Well, let's think about what it's made of. Noodles are made of flour and water. And flour is made from wheat which is a plant. Who knows where cheese comes from? M?

M: Goats!

Teacher: Okay... or?

S: Cows!

Me: Right. So we can get cheese from goats, cows or even sheep. And they all eat grass so that they can grow and make milk. Who else has a favorite food? M2?

M2: Tomatoes.

Me: Okay! Now that's an easy one. B, you know what plant we can thank for tomatoes, right?

B: One in a garden?

Me: Yes. Which plant grows tomatoes?

B: [blank stare]

Me: The tomato plant. What is your favorite food?

B: Pasta.

Me: Okay, so we talked about noodles before. Do you remember what they are made of?

B: Ham?

Me: No... but you could eat ham with your pasta.

B: Hamburgers?

Me: No. Pasta is made from flour which...

D: Pasta is made of power?

Me: No, flour. Okay, what if I told you my favorite food was chicken nuggets [not true]? What are chicken nuggets made of?

G: Chicken.

Me: Right. And what do you think chickens eat? C?

C: Umm... chickens?

Me: No, chickens don't usually eat other chickens. M?

M: Corn.

Boy, was that an adventure! It was funny to see how nothing has really changed in school. There are the kids who raise their hands even if they have no clue what the answer, or even the question, is. There are the kids who never raise their hands. There are the kids who demand a lot of your attention. And there are the kids you don't even realize were in the group until ten minutes before you leave. It's a crazy place, school. My hat is off to my teacher friends! I'd forgotten how nutty it can be.

I'm running out of time!

Why did I think that things would slow down after August? That will be my busy month, I said, and then it will be smooth sailing. Well, I neglected to remember how much work it takes to keep a sailboat afloat and on course, I guess.

The calendar is full. November's calendar is beyond full. And I still need to dig next year's vegetable garden and sew some Halloween costumes!

I'm hoping to be able to get the necessary supplies to start on the garden today. This town is over-run with stray cats and cats who have homes but run the streets all day and have nothing better to do than poop in my garden and the dirt floor of my garage. Naughty kitties! So I can't just dig a garden. Oh, no. I need to also put fencing around the garden when I'm done. So, it is off to the salvage yard and the hardware store for me.

Meanwhile, I need to get to making a couple of costumes for the kids, one of whom is quite settled on his costume and the other of whom keeps trying to convince me he needs to be a Powerpuff Girl. (Go ahead and guess.) But the one who is settled wants to unnecessarily paint his face and keeps changing his mind about what color. Naughty kiddies! Then my husband has a grand idea which involves my cutting his hair twice in 2 days. (Go ahead and try to figure his costume out.)

I also have to find time today to prepare for the nature program/puppet show at school tomorrow. Sorry guys, there will be no video. Jeremy has to chase the DeeDee at home. It's just pictures on sticks for puppets anyway. You aren't missing much. (You can see a preview here.) But I also need to get my hands on some wax paper to prepare for the lesson on leaves.

And I still need to finish my blanket because it is mighty cold at night now.

I have my hands full.


Luckily for me, I also had my mouth full-- of the first pumpkin pie of the season, seen here with a steamy apple pie for Sebastian. The fool does not like pumpkin pie. Not my child.

I am surviving

So far, I have made it through more than half of Jeremy's current business trip. The mornings have mysteriously been easier with him gone, but the nights have been, well, nightmarish.

That Sebastian, like his father, seems to think sleeping is for suckers and pitches a huge fit every night. Or he just gets rude and unpleasant and makes me want to leave the room without kissing him goodnight. That almost happened on Wednesday but when I made for the door he cried, "Oh, Mama! Please don't leave! You are one of my favorite people! I'm sorry! Thank you for the advice." I couldn't very well deny him a kiss then. The advice? Don't be a rude boy.

It, of course, didn't stop the kids from waging war while I tried to talk to a friend and make dinner yesterday. I asked Sebastian to do his spelling homework, so what was Dorian's response to his compliance? Throwing a metal milk can at his brother's head. Awesome. Then he was punching me and throwing things. And laughing hysterically like a little devil. While I was dealing with that situation, Sebastian took the opportunity to run off without finishing his sentences.

I seriously considered walking out the door and not turning back. However, I have put too much time and effort into this house over the last 2 months to leave it behind. And if I tried tossing the kids out on the street, they would have just come crying at the door again, so I was forced to work it out. Maybe next time it will be worth the drive to Nebraska.

It may seem counter-intuitive

But I swear public schooling is much harder for me than home schooling ever was.

It is far more tiring. Getting Sebastian ready in the morning, making a lunch before 8am while simultaneously making breakfast, making sure he has everything he needs in his backpack, ensuring he's wearing the appropriate combination of layers for a 35 degree morning and a 75 degree afternoon, getting to the bus stop at 7:58, spending a half hour twice a day waiting for the bus that is late 80% of the time, doing way more homework than a first grader who has been gone for 8 hours should ever have to do, struggling with the resulting bad attitude/exhaustion-- it's all wearing me out.

Add to that the never-ending requests for baked goods, the PTA meetings, the healthy snack prep at school once a week, and my up-coming puppet show performance and you have one chronically fatigued mama.

But he loves it so far, so I'll grin and bear it. Or grimace and bear it. I might need to go back to caffeinated coffee, though.

A nutrition question

When I ate the entire bunch of organic asian greens from our CSA for lunch, did I make it okay that I had fudge at 10am and have my sights set on a big glass of chocolate milk?

Or should I have had the greens for breakfast instead?

All School Sing

Every Tuesday, Sebastian's school has All School Sing, which is pretty self-explanatory. It is also totally crazy. There is a group of 4 or 5 repressed rock-n-rollers accompanying the music teacher. They remind me of Matthew Broderick and his fellow teacher in Election.

The first time Dorian and I went, the cross country team did 2 laps around the audience which sits on the floor of the gym. That was the time that we learned our new favorite song, "Black Socks".

Today was totally out of control. The kids were supposed to get to taste test some cauliflower from everyone's favorite Walker Farm. But one teacher comes out with a phone pretending to talk to Dustin's daddy about why the weather conditions haven't been good enough to have enough cauliflower ready for the whole school. (The kids did not seem in the least bit disappointed by this news. Shock.) So instead, the music teacher starts wailing on the piano to herald "Will it float?" a rip off of the Letterman show. All the kids were hooting and hollering trying to guess if a head of cauliflower would float. It did. At various points in the program, the game was played with a baseball (yes), provolone cheese (no) and a bell (yes, for a short time). After the kids all did the chicken dance, the music teacher was calling for a chicken, but the cafeteria ladies did not have one.

Why didn't we do this when I was in school?

It's House Party Time!

We had our open house today, and it was a blast! About 35 people took a break from admiring the foliage to come check out the new digs and bring goodies for our neighbors in need. We asked that instead of housewarming gifts our guests should bring a donation for the Drop In Center. Sebastian made signs for the boxes: one for food, one for toiletries and one for clothing. We ended up with a full box of food, 2 boxes of warm clothes and one not so full box of toiletries. I'm sure all of it will be appreciated.

We had beautiful weather, a yard full of happy kids and a house full of happy adults. What more could I ask for?

Special thanks to everyone who came, especially those who came from far away. It was great to see everyone!

Look what I did today!

I overcame my fear of electrical current long enough to install a new programmable thermostat. It works. I did it myself in about 30 minutes. And it claims it could save me up to 33% on my energy bills. We'll see about that. What I'm looking forward to is having it turn the heat on a half hour before we wake up. That, I'm hoping, will prevent the children from wearing hats to the breakfast table and crying about how cold they are. Hello new programmable thermostat!
And goodbye old lady thermostat! (Now if I could just say goodbye to that terrible wallpaper...)

What a dummy!

I have been a real idiot this week. So far, I have:

• Worn my shirt backwards for about 5 hours (mostly in public) before I realized that was why I felt like I was choking all day.
• Walked all the way to the post office before I realized I didn't have the letter that was the whole reason I was walking downtown in the first place.
• Run the portable dishwasher without turning the water on. You can't wash dishes without water. Duh. The magic box is not that magical.

The knitting news

Yesterday, I bought the last of the yarn I need for the queen-sized blanket. All I need to do is knit it up and sew it up and then I can live it up.
And about the only good thing to come from last night's debate was the beginning of my new scarf. It's made from a very texturally interesting yarn that goes from being very fine and thin to super bulky in the course of 3 or 4 stitches. It is very, very soft wool. I bought so much of it, that I think I can get 2 scarves out of it. Maybe someone else needs such a soft, pretty scarf. Then we could be all matchy matchy and start an evil clique who ostracizes people with acrylic store bought scarves. Or not.

You'd have to be pretty tired...

to fall asleep in this position.

Another busy day in a string of busy days

My day started bright and early when the boys' experiment in sharing a bed went terribly wrong. So, I decided to make the best of it and knit myself a hat from my new yarn.

Then, we went for a scenic drive. Probably 90% of my drives could be termed "scenic" (I go through a covered bridge to get to Sebastian's school for chrissakes) but we thought we'd enjoy the foliage. After lunch, we came home so I could caulk.

Then, Jeremy helped me dice lots of apples so that I could can them. And here they are:

While the apples were cooking, I was knitting some wristlets to match the hat. I am not so magical that they are done, but they are about 2/3 knit and then I just need to sew them up. Then I can start the charcoal grey scarf.

And after I put the kids to bed, I made the valances for the kitchen windows:

And now I'm very, very tired.

My new theory

The other day, I decided that Sarah Palin was nominated because the Republicans want to prove they can have someone dumber than W elected to a high office.

But this morning, I realized that this has been Republican policy for as long as I have been aware politically. They seem to like the combination of an older man with a questionable psychology and a "likable" doofus.

Reagan/Bush: Bumbling old fool for Pres, former CIA agent prone to weeping for VP

Bush/Quayle: see above for Pres, spelling-impaired young'un for Veep

GW/Cheney: drunken, born-again with fake accent for Prez, creepy psychopath for VP

McCain/Palin: POW "maverick" for Pres, completely uninformed small time clown for VP

It has been a pretty successful MO for them so far.

And I was disappointed to hear so many women supporting her while I was at the dentist this morning. The woman is just plain not prepared to do this job. If she weren't so ignorant, I would think it was great that she had been nominated. She's a woman who doesn't come from a privileged background. She would be the embodiment of the whole "anyone could be President" ideal that we are spoon-fed as elementary school students. But she is the perfect example of why just "anyone" shouldn't be.

It's coming along

I am happy to say that I have not only unpacked, but been working on the blanket. I think this is the last section of the third panel. I'll find out for sure when I measure it after the section is done. Then, the end will be in sight. One more panel and the border and I will be done.

The only problem is that I am very itchy to start on that new yarn I bought. And in case you hadn't noticed, it's October now, which means Halloween costumes. And I still need to make kitchen curtains... And living room ones...

Harvest season has been busy, but I have a feeling winter will be pretty full, too.