Jeremy left bright and early (or maybe it wasn't bright at 4:45, I try not to be aware at that time) this morning. I really was doing okay with trying to accept this trip to Costa Rica. Other than that little blip when he brought home his itinerary, I was cool. Yesterday, not so much. Or, not at all.
Okay, I totally fell apart into a sobbing mass of jealous misery. Because, you know what?, no matter how you look at this, it is totally unfair to me. So I am being a big baby about it, because that is what you do when life is unfair, right? You cry while peeing because the bathroom is one of the safest places to be hidden from children and a good place to get all your dehydrating done. You kick whatever is available that you can't break and won't hurt your foot. You feel that terrible weight in the sinuses over your cheekbones and know that they are all full of disgusting snot that will spill forth the next time you fall over the edge of self-pity. And you try to look cute so that you don't have to put on the sweatpants you'd rather be wearing that will only remind you of the exercise class you can't go to because someone (you) has to be with the kids. And it all sucks.
And mostly it sucks, not because I would love to be in Costa Rica right now, but because I want to be with Jeremy right now. I love him. And I miss him already. And when I think about the 12+ years we have been together, I can't think of any time that we went 128 hours without speaking to each other. 128 hours is a long time. Maybe not in the grand scheme of the world at large it's not. But in the grand scheme of my little world, it really is.
Subscribe to:
Post Comments (Atom)
1 comment:
i totally feel you. it is no fun to be without your honey. and i want to know when you find an affordable spa vacation. maybe you could have one just for you (to try it out) and then the second time get all your girly friends together and we could all pack our enema bags for the overnighter. props to you, my friend!
Post a Comment