In defense of homeschool

Yesterday at KidsPlayce, I was confronted by another mother who was totally offended by our choice to homeschool. (I'm getting really tired of going there.) I was talking to a different woman who also has her 5 year old at home this year. She is planning on putting her son in public Kindergarten next year, but considering homeschooling her teen aged foster child. The other mother then butts in from nowhere, "Homeschool?! Really? Huh!" Then she proceeds to say that she doesn't think it's fair. "Not to the child, but..." She trails off, never to complete the thought, so I still haven't figured out who exactly it is unfair to. Unfair to the other kids who may want to bully my kids or copy their homework or be their friends? Unfair to the teachers who obviously need another kid in their classes? Who knows?
Then she asks how my children will "socialize"-- a nebulous term. So, I had to point out to her that she sees us out everywhere. We are always doing something where there are other children around. And we're not hermits, although the idea is more appealing all the time. Both of my kids are friendly with people of all ages which is socialized enough for me.

It's not that I don't understand people's arguments. When Sebastian was 9 months old, a friend with a slightly older toddler loaned me a copy of a book on homeschooling. That book made me so mad. It was written by a disciple of John Holt, who has authored many books on the topic. In that book, I discovered that Holt was not even a parent, much less a homeschooling one, so who was he to extol its virtues? What did he know about being home with your child day in and day out forever? One 9 month old nursing baby was burning me out, and we weren't even tackling algebra yet. And I was angered by the abandonment of the public school system, which I believe in wholeheartedly. The woman who loaned me the book was a former public school teacher and she didn't think it was good enough? And what about learning about deadlines, and how to get along with others from different backgrounds? We debated the topic on several occasions, neither of us ever changing our minds.

Funny thing: her daughter started public Kindergarten this fall, and my son is at home.

The fact is that before you have kids, or really know who your kids are, you can have all the philosophies you want. In the end, you have to do what is right for your individual child. And I don't believe that the school system in place in our town is equipped to effectively challenge and educate a 5 year old who can read better than most 5th graders. Their only concern, based on my conversations with them, is the fact of his November birthday. Like a lot of bureaucracy, it is entirely arbitrary, and does not take into account his individual skills. And until we see that he will be better off in school, he is going to be home with us where he is thriving.

Feel free to comment with any of your own questions or concerns, and I will be happy to address them.